GM Freak Magazine, issue 1

These just keep on coming, don’t they?

“GM Freak” by GMC member Christopher_L (who seems to have joined a day before releasing this magazine). 10 pages of content.

So, what do we have? A title page, featuring white background and a simple logo which shouts out “Office 2007”. Footer reads “GM Freak 2008 ©”. Great effort seems to have been put into proofreading this magazine…

Usual opening words. Bla bla bla.

P.S. I am very sorry about this issue being so small it’s just we don’t have anyone to interview or anyone asking for their games to be reviewed! If you want to be interviewed or want your
game/app reviewed email us at
Chris.GMF [at] Gmail [dot] com!!

So, you’re writing the first issue of your brand new Game Maker publication. Nobody knows you’re doing this – so let’s just sit back and relax – somebody will come begging us for an interview and/or review, right?!

Table of Contents. 3 articles… great. 5/6 of this page is blank whitespace.

A review of the GM Obfuscator. So, basically, it obfuscates your code. 1 and a half pages worth of screenshots (not even of the program, but Game Maker, showing meaningless bits of obfuscated GML).

Zodiac Online. Meaningless blabber, screenshot.

Halo 0.5. Side-scrolling Halo fangame review.

This halo [sic] fan game has the following: SMG,Magnum,Battle Rifle,Rocket Launcher,Sniper Rifle,Shotgun,Plasma Pistol,Needler,Brute Plasma Rifle,Covenant Caribine [sic],Fuel Rod Cannon,Beam Rifle,Energy Sword,Brute Shot,Frags,Plasmas,Oversheild [sic], and Invisibility! ALL of them in one GM game.

I’m sure this poorly sorted list was fully necessary.

So, I scroll down, expecting something more – but no. The magazine ends here. It just ends. No closing words, no nothing. And we were just getting started!

What do you think?

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  1. Megan:

    Critics trash musicians, writers, directors all the time – are they a “bunch of jackasses” or people with critical insight? How am I a “jackass” for providing critical commentary on Game Maker- related media? How do I have “no life” when I spend less than a hour a week writing for GameMaker Blog?

    Maybe you’re the “jackass” here.

  2. While I agree that most online magazines have a bad first issue, I also think people really need to think things through a little more before they release a half-baked product. Then again, more and more of the GMC is composed of pre-teens that innocently think their magazine is the single greatest thing to hit the net; so I suppose we shouldn’t be too evil.

    Also, I second tuntis.

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